Wednesday, December 17, 2008

17 Things

A friend of mine recently published a list of 17 random facts about herself on her blog, and invited others to do the same. So here are a few things you might not know about me...

  1. I generally prefer to read non-fiction than fiction. Sometimes Christian living books, sometimes linguistics books, most recently triathlon training books.
  2. I rarely drink hot beverages. I don't like coffee or tea, but even hot chocolate doesn't tempt me much: I tend to drink it too quickly and end up burning my tongue every time.
  3. As nice as back and shoulder massages are, I would almost always prefer a calf massage.
  4. I really want to adopt, maybe from China. I'd be open to having my own child as well, but I don't really feel the need to actually birth a baby myself.
  5. I like my feet. I think they're cute.
  6. I have scoliosis and had to wear a back brace from fourth through eighth grades. I had great posture at the time, but it only shows now when I sit to play piano.
  7. I seem to develop crushes easily, and apparently always have to like someone. So, if you're a guy, and you're my friend, and you're single, be careful. I'm just sayin'...
  8. I can't remember the last time I cried.
  9. I generally always prefer veggies to meat, but I only like meat on my pizza, no veggies, except maybe tomatoes.
  10. I've never been to Chicago, even though it's the closest big city. Guess I always choose to go to the mountains instead when I have some time (and money) to get away.
  11. It's been at least 25 years since I've thrown up.
  12. I seem to feel colder more often now than I did before living in Harbin, China. Crazy: I thought nothing would feel cold after the persistently sub-zero temperatures there.
  13. Noises bother me, especially loud ones. Like lots of kids screaming, or concerts, or beeping machines that other people don't even notice...
  14. I think I've changed exactly one diaper in my entire 30 years.
  15. I love traditions, especially around the holidays. I'm also excited to start some traditions of my own once I have a family, like running on Thanksgiving morning.
  16. I've never gotten into the habit of flossing every day. That's one of my New Year's resolutions.
  17. Ironically, 17 is my favorite number. I have no idea why, but I do like that it's prime.

Wanna play? Post a list of 17 random facts on your blog or facebook page, or send me a good old-fashioned email!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Good Beginning

So, ever since I started posting my crazy fortunes, I really look forward to getting my cookie after a nice Chinese lunch. And when I get a sort of normal one, I sometimes try again to see if I can find something stranger the second time around. Actually, it took me three tries this afternoon, but I ended up with this:

"Good beginning is half done."

Huh? Nice... :-)

Monday, November 17, 2008

Welcome Home!

Well, I suppose it's time to post some photos of my new place, especially for those of you who aren't on facebook. I'm all settled in and it really feels like home to me. I'm glad it's such a comfortable place, too, since I spent practically my entire weekend at home, sprawled out on the couch watching movies on T.V.... Stupid immobilizing cold. Anyway, the pictures!

Monday, November 10, 2008

Mary Sunshine

Let the blog war begin! :-)


Mary makes me feel comfortable.
I joined Queen City Wheels to challenge myself at the time trial every Tuesday. And I did. But I came and went each week without really talking to anyone, until I met Mary. Yup, she's the reason I started to feel like a part of the group.

Mary makes me smile.
She's just one of those people who is always pleasant to be around: she's friendly, and outgoing, and... happy. Even when she's complaining as we climb some steep hill, she's still smiling and you know that she's actually thrilled to be there. So it's hard not to be happy when you're with her!

Mary motivates me.
She is an ironman. Sure, she had to work hard to get there, as I'm sure all iron(wo)men do, but she did it! Twice! I never really had that as a goal before, but now I think I've got to try it... And she's so disciplined when it comes to training that she puts me to shame.

Mary challenges me.
She's faster than me. She's stronger than me. She may try to tell you that she's not, but the time trial doesn't lie. But, she makes me want to be faster and stronger. And I think I am already, thanks to her!

Mary encourages me.
She seems to bring out the best in people, and I think that encouragement if often the key. At least, it works for me! I definitely have more confidence because of her, and not just when it comes to biking.

Yup, I think we all need more Marys in our lives. Or maybe we all just need to be a little more Sunshine-y!

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Complete

Meeting people who are lost makes me realize how NOT lost I am, even though I've faced a lot of challenges the last few years. It breaks my heart to see their sadness, knowing that in Christ they could find peace...

This song by Kutless sums up my journey pretty well:

Incomplete it all began
The broken state that I was in
I wished that I was someone else
'Cause I was lost inside myself
I started seeing who I am
The day my life with you began
You clearly solved the mystery
That finding you meant finding me

God, I’ve fallen to my knees
I’m bowing at your feet
I give you all of me
In you I am complete
It’s all because of love
I’m not who I was
I’m who I meant to beI
n you I am complete

God who doesn’t need at all
I heard your voice I felt your call
It’s echoing I cannot shake you off
The stars that shine they bear your name
They sing the song that gives you praise
You’ve captured me
My heart is lifting off

God, I’ve fallen to my knees
I’m bowing at your feet
I give you all of me
In you I am complete
It’s all because of love
I’m not who I was
I’m who I meant to be
In you I am complete

I’ve got to tell the world about the things you’ve done
I want to shout it out, I'm gonna live it now
Amazing grace is why I’m singing

God, I’ve fallen to my knees
I’m bowing at your feet
I give you all of me
In you I am complete
It’s all because of love
I’m not who I was
I’m who I meant to be
In you I am complete

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Pursuit

I have recently come to the conclusion that one of the qualities I find most attractive in a guy is the willingness to pursue his girl.

Maybe it's just me: Maybe I'm overly insecure and need the affirmation. Maybe I don't know what I want and am easily persuaded. Maybe I'm desperate...

But I don't think so.

In fact, I have several very good girlfriends who weren't particularly interested in their now-husbands or boyfriends, but who were won over by their wooing. And I'm probably no different.

I can't say for sure, because I've rarely been pursued in my 30 years, but I'm thinking that I could easily fall for a guy who puts himself out there, who isn't afraid to make the first move, who pursues me. Guess we'll have to wait and see about that, though. That is, if I can guard my heart and be patient enough to not make up mind prematurely...

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Intrigued

I got to spend some time with several intriguing people yesterday. Yay! :-)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Setting Satisfactorily

Another fun fortune cookie prediction:

"You will make many changes before setting satisfactorily."

Uh, what?

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

You WILL Do This

Yup, I think I just might...

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Personality Test Fun

I like personality tests, and really all sorts of quizzes and questionnaires. So when I saw this one on a couple friends' blogs, of course I had to try it! I can't say I like all of their conclusions, particularly on the color grid, (explanations of the traits here), but I do think that the descriptions that follow are fairly accurate. Interesting... And if you'd like to play, too, check it out here!

About you:

As a DIRECTOR, you combine an unusual openness and passion for beauty and style with confidence and a down-to-earth sensibility that allow you to realize your vision.

You are practical and pay attention to the details that others tend to miss.

By focusing on what is real and concrete, you achieve more than those who always have their heads in the clouds.

When it comes to what really matters in your life, you are confident in your ability to succeed.

Having beautiful things in your life gives you pleasure and satisfaction - you have a keen eye for style.

Even when problems present themselves, deep down you know you will overcome these challenges.

When routines get too familiar, you become bored and start looking for ways to spice things up.

You are open to new types of experiences – you are not afraid to take a risk on something new.

You have a highly developed sense of taste – you know what looks good on you, in your home, and in the world at large.

Your independent streak allows you to make decisions efficiently and to trust your instincts.

You are balanced in your approach to problem-solving, not letting your emotions hold you up.

You prefer to have time to plan for things, feeling better with a schedule than with keeping plans up in the air until the last minute.

You do your own thing when it comes to clothing, guided more by practical concerns than by other people's notions of style.

Generally, you believe that you control your life, and that external forces only play a limited role in determining what happens to you.

How you relate to others:

You are outgoing, comfortable with others, and up for anything, which makes you ANIMATED.

Some people find crowds and parties exhausting, but not you! You are able to be yourself in many situations.

Sometimes it is hard for you to understand why others feel the way they do, but that doesn't stop you from trusting them or having faith that they are good people.

You know the world is complicated and that there is often more than one side to a story, so you are careful not to make judgments about others too hastily.

You would rather experience the world than sit back and observe it—you are not one to sit on the sidelines.

You are an independent thinker and don't get too worried about how others might perceive you—you are not self-conscious about being the active, engaged person that you are.

Although you have a keen understanding of different people's life circumstances, you occasionally have trouble seeing why people get so upset and emotional about things—they should just lighten up and have fun!

In addition to having faith in the world, you have faith in the people around you—you trust others to do the right thing and to be honest.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Speaking of Which...

The whole condo-buying thing is one reason I haven't blogged recently: in addition to waiting, there is a surprising amount of paperwork and things I've had to take care of!

The other reason I haven't been online much lately is that until this (Monday) afternoon, we were without internet access, a very annoying effect of the huge windstorm last Sunday. (Which, incidentally, also left me stranded in Newark for a night...)

Anyway, it's good to be back! Though I really shouldn't complain, considering some folks were left without electricity just as long.

The Waiting Game

Buying a home has taught me a lot about patience!
So far, I've had to wait...

To find just the right place.
To get just the right price for said place.
To lock in the mortgage rate at just the right time.
For the home inspection and appraisal.
For the seller to fix some stuff the inspector found.
For the underwriters to give the final o.k.

And I still have to wait for the closing.

And then to have the locks changed.
And the chimney cleaned.
And to paint?
And...

And finally, to move in.

I'm so excited about this new chapter in my life,
and I sort of want to shout, "I can't wait!"

But I know that I can. :-)

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Missing My Kitty...

But apparently I'll be able to bring her back to Cincinnati at the end of the month when I move into my new condo...

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Interview Me

O.k., so my cool friend Kim did this blog interview thing, which sounded like fun. So let's play! Here are the rules:
01. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
02. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
03. You will post the answers to the questions (and the questions themselves) on your blog or journal.
04. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
05. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions. And so on and so on and so on.

And here are my answers to the questions Kim asked me:

1. If someone wanted to make a movie of your life, what would it be about and who would play you?
Uh, it'd probably be about my life, duh. Just kidding... But more specifically? I guess it'd be a drama, with an underlying theme of overcoming adversity. And who'd play me? Well, it's a toss up between Drew Barrymore and Jennifer Garner. What do you think?

2. What do you hope your next relationship will consist of?
Lots and lots of honesty, first and foremost. And spiritual intimacy as well as all the other varieties, like it'd be nice to serve in ministry together. And there should be plenty of action and adventure; for example, backpacking, triathloning, traveling, etc. Oh, and definitely unquestionable commitment, that'd be nice. :-)

3. What instruments do you play and what does it mean to you?
Piano, trumpet, percussion instruments (of the marching band variety), guitar, and a little bass most recently. I must admit that I don't really understand the second part of your question, but I'll answer as best I can... I began taking piano lessons when I was about 5 or 6, and music has been a huge part of my life ever since. When I moved away from home for college, I taught myself guitar because I no longer had a piano, and now worshiping in song is one of the ways I feel closest to God.

4. What three top things would you want to do before you die?
Travel. (Specific places I want to visit include Italy, Peru, Egypt, Cambodia, and more of China.) Get married (again and for good) and have a family (which I would like to include adopting a baby from China). And... I can't think of a third right now, sorry.

5. If you had to visit Michigan, what would you want to do?
You mean, if I GET to visit Michigan! I don't really know, though; I just want to see you! But fun fall-y things are nice, like maybe hiking? I don't know what there is to do up there, though, so I'll leave it to your discretion. :-)

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Coming Home!

Well, I made it! My two months in Princeton are up, and I'm heading back to Cincinnati tomorrow. It's gone quickly, and I've had fun, but I'm also excited to come home.

What I'm Most Looking Forward To
10. Not having to get ready or dressed up for work
9. Not having to make small talk as soon as I get up or get home
8. Not having a curfew (in effect)
7. Playing guitar (and maybe piano) again
6. Being able to check my email at home rather than at the hospital
5. Cooking rather than eating out or eating frozen dinners every day
4. Getting back into yoga and racquetball and soccer
3. My sweet, soft kitty :-)
2. Sunday worship and Friday night Bible study
1. My awesome friends!

What I'm Actually Going to Miss
(So I couldn't come up with 10, but this is still not too shabby!)
6. How close everything is
5. The slightly cooler temperatures
4. Having regular work hours and pay
3. Having minimal expenses (I know: In Princeton?!? But yeah!)
2. Training with a cool running group and masters swim team
1. The new friends I've made...

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Olympic Excitement

O.k., I gotta admit that I've become rather addicted to the Olympics this year. I mean, sure, I've watched them before, but never with such dedication. Which has actually been quite a challenge since I don't really have a T.V. here... But it's worked out all right. Though I'm sad to see them end.

Still, there are certain "sports" which I just find amusing, too. Like fencing. And the "modern" pentathlon. What's up with that? And synchronized swimming. Beautiful, sure, but odd, no? And walking? When did that become an Olympic competition? So, what do you think are the strangest events, in either summer or winter Olympic Games?

Well, anyway, I just wanted to share this fantastic collection of Olympic photos with you all. Check 'em out if you haven't already. Makes me want to be a photographer... Oh, and enjoy the closing ceremony tonight!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Keepin' Busy

Wow! Where've I been?

Well, in addition to working, I've been having a little fun here in Princeton. Meeting some people, watching some Olympics... You know.

Yeah, so I've made a good friend in my neighbor Debbie. (In fact, I'm sitting in her house right now typing this, with her sweet cat to keep me company.) And I've found a couple of really neat groups of athletes to train with. There's a cycling club out here I've been riding with once a week or so. And on one of those rides I met a girl who told me about this running group that does track workouts every Tuesday and longer runs on Thursdays. There's a coach guy that volunteers his time to help other runners since he can't run much anymore, so it's free for us to come out and be on this makeshift track team. (Which is cool, 'cause a couple months ago when I helped a friend out with his school's track meet, I remember thinking, "I wanna be on a track team!" and now I kind of am. Even if it's just for a couple of weeks... ) And finally, some of the runners I met also do this master's swim class thing at a local fitness club, which I checked out last week. And it was awesome, let me tell you what! I used to just jump in the pool and swim for an hour or so, but that's not necessarily smart training. These workouts are probably more strategic, and are really just more fun 'cause they mix things up. Plus you get to do it with friends, which is just cool.

So, yeah. I'm gonna miss Princeton...

But I'm also really looking forward to coming home. :-) See you guys soon! (Aug. 30th...)

Friday, August 1, 2008

Central New Jersey Triathlon

For those of you who can't exactly picture what the transition area at these races looks like, here's a pic. But keep in mind: even though it looks crazy huge, this is really only about a quarter of the entire area!

And this is how you set up all your stuff, usually on a small towel under or next to your bike, which is propped up on those pole racks. Just FYI: You're assigned to a particular rack based on your race number, but you can put your bike anywhere along there where it fits. Obviously, it's best to be closest to the inside aisle, though, so you don't have as far to run or as many other people to maneuver through in transition. So, get there early! (Mine's the third bike there on the rack.)

And for anyone interested (or just for my own personal records later), my times at the triathlon last weekend were as follows:

My overall time was 2:55:08, which was 476th out of the 739 total competitors in the olympic distance triathlon.
I was 135th out of 265 women in the race.
In my age group, I was 22nd out of 38.

My swim (1500 yards) took 32:44, which was 379th overall.
My first transition was 3:08.
My bike (24 miles) took 1:10:16, which was 343rd overall. I averaged 19.8 mph.
My second transition was 1:54.
My run (10 km) took 1:07:08, which was 602nd overall. I averaged 10:50 min/mi.

Monday, July 28, 2008

I Was There

Irmgard, the 73-year-old German lady I'm staying with in Princeton, always greets me in the morning or when I come home with ads, articles, events, etc. that she thinks I might or should be interested in. Well, the headline she showed me this morning was: "Triathlete feared drowned." Apparently, a 52-year-old local man never came out of the water after the swim leg of his race yesterday. Rescue workers searched the lake in the afternoon, but thunderstorms impeded their efforts, so they're supposed to be resuming their search this morning.

Here's the full article I saw this morning. And here's a shorter blurb, with pictures.

This just in...

And here's the follow-up article from Tuesday's paper.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

The Champion of Whatever

Chinese fortune cookies amuse me. I mean, besides the fact that they don't actually have fortune cookies in China, the "fortunes" often aren't really even. So I think I'll start sharing some of my favorites that I find. Today's:

"Go for the gold today! You'll be the champion of whatever."

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Why?

Why do I like ETS and this job so much?
Why are my mentors so cool?
Why is Princeton so pretty?
Why is everything so close and convenient here?
Why do I enjoy the diversity so much?

Why haven’t I met many Christians here?
Why is the church not as warm and welcoming as CCC?
Why don’t I get to play guitar anymore?
Why is Princeton so expensive?
Why do all my co-workers feel stuck here?
Why are my friends and family so far away?

Why did I make up my mind before I came that I wouldn’t like it?
Why did I assume I wouldn’t stay even if I were offered a job?
And yet, why did I decide to wait to sign a new lease in Cincinnati?
Why do I feel like crying whenever I think about moving here?
And yet, why do I feel like it might be a really good opportunity?
Why do I choose what I want rather than what I think I should do?
And yet, why do I assume those two things are different?

Why can’t I have it all?

So basically what I’m saying is: I’d appreciate your prayers. :-)

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Small and Weak

So I've been in Jersey two weeks now. I'm really enjoying the job, and I've met some nice people, but I'm still just really missing everyone back home. It's funny, 'cause I don't think I took my friends for granted while I was in Cincinnati - I knew they were great and I treasured time spent with them. But I still can't seem to fully engage with my new surroundings because my heart just isn't here. In fact, I think I'm afraid to really like it here because I don't want to leave Cincinnati for good.

But anyway, the point is... I've been trying hard to keep in touch with everyone in Cincinnati, and I so look forward to chats and emails with old friends. But I can't help but wonder why I don't treasure my God as much, why I don't look forward to time spent with him the same way I long to connect with those he's created and placed in my life. I do take him for granted, and I know it, but I still don't know what to do about it. I think the problem is that I'm small and weak. My mind can't possibly comprehend the depth of who God is or what he's actually rescued me from. He seems distant and impersonal, even though I know that he isn't. And I think that's what's most frustrating: the discrepancy between what I feel and what I know, between how I want my relationship with God to look and how it actually is.

Hmm. Guess I just wish I knew how to love and enjoy God more. Any thoughts on that one?

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Stuck in the Middle

At work, I'm old. Other times, not so much.

See, the other three interns in my office are 19, 20 and 21. Two of them can't (legally) drink or gamble, none of them can rent a car, they're all still in school. Sometimes it's funny, like when I'm talking about a musical I was in in high school, 15 years ago, and the other girl says, "Fifteen years ago, I was FOUR." In fact, we joke about the age difference almost every day, which is fine, but sometimes I do just feel a little out of place with them.

Then I come home, and hang out with 73-year old Irmgard. And the other guy who rents a room from her is probably in his 50's and always calls me "kiddo." Then on Monday I went up to the library for this "Noodle Talk" group thing, and it was basically me chatting it up with a bunch of 50- and 60-year-olds again. Interesting, but still, felt a little out of place.

So, yeah! Life's a little strange right now. But it's o.k.: keeps me on my toes!

Monday, July 14, 2008

Philadelphia Women's Triathlon Results

So I realize that these were "only" women competing, and that it was probably the first race for many of them, and that a lot of them probably weren't there to be really competitive, but I still think I did really well! Here are my times (keep in mind these were shorter distances than the last one I did):

My overall time was 1:39:06, which was 157th out of the 723 women who completed the triathlon. In my age group, I was 23rd out of 80.

My swim (700 yards) took 14:18, which was 206th overall.
My first transition was 2:54.
My bike (17.1 miles) took 49:54, which was 46th overall. Yea! I averaged 20.4 mph.
My second transition was 2:06.
My run (5km) took 29:55, which was 380th overall. I averaged 9:39 min/mi.

So there ya go! Good times... (I meant "fun" when I first typed that, but pretty good times for the race too!)

Sunday, July 13, 2008

A Different Kind of Race

So, today I was in the Philadelphia Women's Triathlon. Now, I've done two of these before, but this one was different. First of all, there were almost 1000 competitors, where the other two had only two or three hundred. And there were more than 70 women in my age group today as compared to six or eight the last two times. Plus, this time the athletes were all women, which was cool. The other two races were both at a rural park, too, while this one was in the center of the city, so there were a lot more spectators today as well. But most notably, there was a huge sense of community or camaraderie this time. It all began with the pre-race meeting/pep rally event on Saturday. I met a couple of nice women there who were doing their first triathlon. I found them again on Sunday, too, so it was nice to kind of know a couple other people even though I signed up for the race alone. Anyway, after the race, most people hung out for awhile, too, and they even had an awards ceremony! All this was new to me, since the last two times, people pretty much took off as soon as they were finished. So, put all these things together, and you have a great race experience! I did well, too, though I'll post the details later, once they're online. And now I'm totally excited for my next race in two weeks, which might be even cooler since there will be 2500 triathletes there!

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Out Of My Element

I feel like I've become quite the adventurer of late. I mean, that I would even pack up and move ten hours away by myself is in itself a bit surprising to me, but now I'm exploring even more. Like, for instance, I'm currently sitting in the living room of one of the other interns, in Philadelphia. I drove here this morning because there is no race-day packet pick-up for the triathlon tomorrow. Which is also pretty amazing: that I even signed up for this race not knowing anyone else doing it or even anyone else in the city. But God provided this girl, and it's totally cool 'cause I didn't have to pay for a hotel room like I thought I'd have to, and I even got to do a load of laundry this evening!

Anyway, I also feel a bit out of my element because most of the people I've met out here aren't Christian, or at least don't appear to be. It's interesting, because in Cincy, most of the people whose paths I crossed were. Even a lot of the jobs I had in Cincy seemed to be places where a lot of other believers worked, but not so much here apparently. It could be a great opportunity to share with them what's most important to me, but instead I just seem to be paralyzed, realizing that I'm ill-equipped for the task. But then again, that just might be the best place to be: weak so that He can be my strength.

Anyway, I'm still curious to find out what this summer is all about, what God wants to do in me and through me during my time here... So, yeah! Good times.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Feeling More at Home

You know, when I was in China, certain little connections to Cincinnati made me feel closer to home, like seeing a P&G product. Well, I got the same feeling yesterday when I was driving through the Princeton campus and spotted a very familiar-looking building. Immediately, I could tell that the Lewis Library was designed by Frank Gehry because it reminded me so much of the fluid form of the Molecular Studies building on U.C.'s east campus. Anyway, it made me smile. But I'm also just feeling better about everything because I'm getting into a routine with work, working out, checking email, etc. So, no worries. :-)

Monday, July 7, 2008

First Day at ETS

Work today was great. I'm sure part of that was just getting out of the house for the day and meeting some cool new people, but also I think I'm just really going to enjoy the actual work. Which I should probably explain a bit now that I know a little more: apparently we summer interns write hundreds or even thousands of questions that get put into a pool. Then throughout the year, the full-time, on-site teams polish them up, test them, put them together, etc., etc. But it all starts with us. I'll be working on the TOEIC test (Test of English for International Communication), writing items for the speaking and writing parts specifically. There are five of us on those test sections, plus another six writing the listening and reading parts of the TOEIC. And I'm not sure how many other interns there are working on the TOEFL questions, but I'm thinking maybe another 15 or so. Anyway, we all seem to be getting along, and there's even been talk of getting a game of kickball or ultimate frisbee together, so that should fun. However, I am feeling a bit old: most of the other interns are still in school, and one of the girls on my team is only 19! So I guess happy hour is out...

All in all, though, it'll be good I'm sure. They did also mention that there will be openings we could apply for if we find that we enjoy the work, which could be really cool. But I'm still very hesitant to even consider something like that at this point since I miss everyone and everything in Cincinnati so much! Guess I'll just have to wait and see how everything goes. Ah, another lesson in patience and trust...

Sunday, July 6, 2008

First Impressions of Princeton

Irmgard (my new landlady/roommate):
sweet, sad, outgoing, helpful, lonely.

The house:
old, dark, a little dirty/cluttered, sufficient for the short-term.

The neighborhood:
very diverse, quiet, close to everything.

The Wagners (Lance's sister's family):
warm, welcoming... just plain awesome.

Being uncomfortable:
priceless.

Yeah, uncomfortable pretty much sums it up at this point. I know that's a good thing sometimes, though, and I'm trying to keep a positive attitude: it'll be a great chance to get some more reading and praying done without all the distractions I have in Cincy; I could use a lesson in living simply; and I think I can really be a blessing to Irmgard. But yeah, it might not be an easy summer, and I do appreciate your prayers...

Friday, July 4, 2008

Just Friends?

O.K., so let me just pose this question: Can guys and girls be just friends?

I think that it's possible but rare, because more often than not one of the people will end up wishing it were more. This brings me back to my old "time theory" as well: if you spend enough time with a person, you will probably end up liking them at some point. At least that's been my experience. Which makes sense, because if you like a person enough as a friend to want to spend so much time with them, it's only logical that it could develop into deeper feelings over time. Because the qualities you appreciate in a friend are generally the same qualities you would hope for in a mate. But, then again, maybe that's just me...

So yeah, I think that perhaps perusing your friends of the opposite sex is the most logical place to look for a potential mate. But that just gets tricky then, because if you're not looking for more than a good friendship, you really have to be very careful about how much time you're spending with these people and how much you share with them... Hmm.

Anyway, those are just my thoughts. What you do you think?

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Virtual Intimacy

So I've got this new friend, Kim, who I've been chatting online with a bit lately. In fact, we've probably talked almost as much online as we have face to face since we've only met in person twice. Still, it's been cool getting to know her better through our online conversations, and I'm excited for her to come back to Cincinnati again so we can hang out some more.

What I find interesting about this whole scenario, though, is that it seems to be working, that we seem to be developing a real friendship through this virtual means. But why would that surprise me? Well, I think it's because I've been in similar situations where it was a lot more problematic. For example, I had one friend I talked to a lot on the phone, like for hours at a time, but then when we'd meet in person it just seemed weird, like suddenly the intimacy we'd developed on the phone was missing in person, if that makes sense. Then there was this other person I became "facebook friends" with after meeting once, and we IMed a lot over the course of several weeks. But again, when we met in person the next time, it was just awkward.

So this is one thing Kim and I were chatting about yesterday, this sort of "false intimacy" that seems to develop quite easily when getting to know someone through these modern modes of communication. She mentioned that there's sometimes a superficiality to such conversations, which I can definitely see, but my experience has more often been the opposite: I seem to be quite comfortable discussing topics online that I would never talk about in person with someone I only recently met. And I think this could get me into trouble, particularly when the person I'm chatting with is of the male variety. See, we have these really deep virtual conversations and I think that we're becoming really close, but then when we meet up in person, I realize that in reality we are acquaintances at best.

Problems have also arisen when I've tried to have a serious conversation online, even when it's with a good friend. For example, no matter how well I know a person, I think it's still much more likely for misunderstandings to occur when communicating online, because subtle messages or feelings often get lost without the aid of body language, facial expressions, or tone of voice. Apologies also seem to be particularly difficult because I never seem to know whether the issue has been resolved. Or if I bare my soul to someone online about an especially personal topic, the next time we get together I can't help but think, "Did we really have that conversation?" and the intimacy still seems to be less than what I would expect had we simply talked face to face.

Yeah. So, conclusions? Well, it seems to me that building friendships online may be fine, but it gets a lot trickier when it's a guy-girl thing. (But that gets into a whole nother discussion about whether or not guys and girls can be "just" friends...) Also, if it's a significant conversation of any sort, it's probably safest to just do it in person.

Monday, June 30, 2008

One Of Those Moments

So I had a great idea for a post today (just ask Kim, she'll tell you...), but it's going to have to wait because I'm just not feeling it right now. Why not? Well, 'cause I'm sitting out here in Christy's backyard waiting for the fire we built to die down. And we're laughing a lot because we were just trying to write a song for Lydia who was stuck inside writing a paper while we were enjoying the fire and watching several loitering deer (because for some reason I told her that's what we were doing when she took a break to visit us awhile back). So anyway, Christy's hilarious songs are cracking me up, and we were just having so much fun that I was (perhaps somewhat arrogantly) thinking, "if people could see us now, they couldn't help but fall in love with us!" Now, I've had these moments before, times when I really just like me and think others should too, but they don't happen often and I'm pretty sure others would actually just think I'm really strange if they saw me. Yeah, I just don't think it works the way that I wish it did. Pity...

(Incidentally, I'll get back to the other cool post I had planned maybe tomorrow, and another will follow at some point about some of the things that make me like me, as well as some of things I don't like so much...)

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Reusables?

So, my parents came down to Cincinnati today to help me pack everything up so I can move out of this apartment and head off to New Jersey next week. And you know, I must say, although I don't enjoy the packing and moving, it sure is a good way to consolidate all the junk we Americans tend to accumulate when we stay in any one place too long. Well anyway, as we were going through old stuff and making decisions about what to take, what to pack, what to throw away, etc., my mom remembered that my old wedding dress is still stored away in a closet up at their house. So she asked me what I might want to do with it. She assumed that I probably wouldn't want to hang onto it now since the sentimentality is gone, and that perhaps I'd want to sell it. "Also," she said, "if you do get married again you probably won't be having another big formal wedding, right? And even if you did you wouldn't wear the same dress." Hmm, I hadn't really thought about all that. But now that I am, yeah, I suppose I'd have to agree: it'd be a little weird to wear the same dress. Still, it's a shame, because it's a really nice dress...

Anyway, that whole discussion reminded me of a similar dilemma I've been facing regarding my old ring. If I try to sell it, I'll get much less for it that it originally cost or than it's really worth, so my first thought was to take the diamond out and use it if and when I do get married again. I mean, if my future fiance had it reset, it'd be like a completely new and different ring, at least in my mind. But some friends have told me that they'd be surprised if he'd be comfortable using a diamond that was purchased by my ex. Hmm. Yeah, I can understand that. But again, it's really too bad: that could save a good bit of money...

Thoughts, anyone? About the possible weirdness of reusing these things, or perhaps other ways to make use of them?

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Frustrated

O.k., so I know that we all struggle with certain issues, right? Well, I've just been feeling particularly frustrated with myself lately and came back to these verses again:

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. . . . I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing. . . . So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God--through Jesus Christ our Lord! . . . Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.

Romans 7:15-8:2


It's one of my favorite and least favorite passages in the Bible: favorite because I realize that I'm not alone in my sin-struggles; least favorite because even though it ends well, I can just feel the tension as I read it, like I'm physically being pulled in two different directions. It makes me feel a little hopeless... Hmm. But if I read it more carefully, to the end, I remember that there is relief, rescue, freedom in Christ! And it's not referring to the freedom to go on sinning, but rather that through Christ we actually have the freedom to choose NOT to sin when we're confronted with it! That's some powerful stuff. I just wish I remembered to tap into that power more consistently...

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Physical Stuff

Yeah, I hesitate to include these, 'cause if I hope to be loved for who I am inside rather than my appearance, I would hope I could offer the same. And yet, let's be honest, these things matter to an extent. So...

He should...
  • Be taller than me.
  • Have good teeth (i.e. straight, white).
  • Be bigger/stronger than me. (I.e. not too skinny, though not too chunky either.)
  • Want to try to look nice, but not be obsessed with his appearance.
  • Have nice eyes and a smile that makes me melt.
  • Not be very hairy, particularly in the chest/back regions.
  • (I also tend to prefer dark hair and eyes, though that’s definitely not a hard and fast rule.)
  • (Strong/toned arms and shoulders are sweet.)
  • (Soccer-player legs, too.)

Friday, June 20, 2008

Interests, Etc.

He should...

  • Love China. (Bonus points if he’s been there, but he should at least have the desire to visit/live/work there at some point in the future.)
  • Like and want kids, and be willing to consider adoption, especially internationally.
  • Be passionate about music, especially for worshiping. He should probably play at least one instrument, but at the very least must be able to carry a tune. (Bonus points if he can harmonize…)
  • Prefer activity to inactivity. E.g. He would rather hike, or bike, or climb, or run, or… than watch T.V. or go out to eat.
  • Enjoy being out in nature.
  • Like to play like a kid (e.g. jumping in leaves, playing in the snow, climbing trees).
  • Like to travel and enjoy photography, or at least be patient with me when I want to stop and take a lot of pictures.
  • Like and fit in with my family, and I with his.
  • Not be allergic to and at least tolerant of cats.
  • Be willing to watch and maybe even enjoy chick flicks and musicals, from time to time.
  • Not be obsessed with watching sports on T.V., playing video games, surfing online, etc.
  • Enjoy board/card games.
  • Be able or interested in learning how to dance (ballroom-type stuff).
  • Like massages, both giving and receiving.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Personality Stuff

He should...
  • Value communication and recognize its importance in sustaining any type of relationship. He should be willing to discuss even negative emotions/situations, however uncomfortable that may be.
  • Be honest, open, and not deceptive.
  • Come from a similar background/upbringing as me (e.g. family values, hometown characteristics, etc.).
  • Be very intelligent, as well as educated.
  • Be patient with me in my weaknesses and willing to help me become more Christ-like.
  • Be encouraging. He should be excited to help me achieve goals that I have set for myself. He should be quick to praise me when I do well and be constructive and gentle with his criticism.
  • Be funny/silly. He should be able to make me laugh and willing to laugh at himself.
  • Be adventurous.
  • Appreciate my quirkiness.
  • Not be prone to skepticism/suspicion.
  • Be wise with money, but not to an extreme (i.e. frugal, not cheap).
  • Not be extremely introverted or extroverted, but rather somewhere in the middle.
  • Be optimistic. He should assume the best about people rather than the worst.
  • Be organized and enjoy planning.
  • Also be spontaneous at times.
  • Treasure traditions.
  • Value eating healthy and exercising.
  • Want to live... in a small city, somewhere with four seasons, where it snows and doesn’t get too hot, not too far from or too close to family, within driving distance to some mountains.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Spiritual Stuff

He should...

  • Be passionate about God, actively pursuing that relationship above all else.
  • Be passionate about missions, whether doing or supporting or educating...
  • Desire/plan to be involved in some sort of ministry throughout his life.
  • Have the desire and ability to be the spiritual leader in our relationship/family. Being in relationship with him should spur on my spiritual growth rather than distract me from God.
  • Hold similar convictions as me about non-essential spiritual matters.
  • Have career ambitions, but should value God and family more.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

A Teammate

So where were we? Oh, yes...

The other day, I was having dinner with a dear friend. She told me about a conversation she had many years ago with a group of single girls: each of them chose a word that described the kind of partner they would want. One said "a clown," another wanted more of "a coworker," and my friend was hoping for "a constant companion." I thought about it for just a moment and knew what I would ask for: "a teammate." I am crazy active and I love to play, plus my love language is primarily quality time, so I want someone I can do lots of cool stuff with. Basically, I want a best friend. Of course, most importantly I want our relationship to glorify God, but I think that will happen when we are who God made us to be, individually and as a couple. So I expect that we'll have many things in common, from our backgrounds, to our personalities, to the activities we enjoy, to our passions, to our hopes and dreams for the future...

Details will follow.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Um, well... Yeah. I'm Home!

So, bad news. They got the part Sunday morning and put it in, but apparently that part didn't work either. SO... We had to cancel the trip. The Super 8 shuttle bus took us in three loads back to our first bus to collect the rest of our things, then to the Greyhound station in Gary, IN. Then THAT bus was late 'cause a driver didn't show up, so we just got back to the 'Nati at about 1:30 am. But despite the fact that we never even made it to our first stop, Chicago, we still made some new friends and had a lot of fun! I'll post pictures soon...

Sunday, June 15, 2008

This Just In...

So let's take a brief detour as I fill you in on what is turning out to be more of an adventure than we bargained for...

We took off from Cincinnati Friday night at maybe 10:00 pm, more than an hour late. We stopped about midnight to get ready for bed in Walmart's restrooms, while the drivers converted the bus seats into beds. (Which was pretty cool, by the way, as the bus was transformed into what looked an awful lot a hard sleeper train in China.) We stopped at about 4:30 am a little outside Chicago to fuel up, but continued sleeping there till about 6:30. It was then that we discovered a river of coolant (if that's what that bright green fluid is) flowing slowly away from the bus. After a few calls and a visit from a mechanic, we learned that the broken part could not be repaired and a new one could not be found in all of Chicago. So we spent the whole day stranded at the rest stop, feeling a lot like Tom Hanks in The Terminal. After a whole lot of waiting, and complaining, and debating, everyone finally agreed on a new plan: one of the drivers would fly to Boston to pick up the new part, fly back, and fix the bus in the morning. We would stay at a hotel. We would continue on the trip as planned, just one day late. We would skip the day in Las Vegas and swing by the north rim instead of the south rim of the Grand Canyon to make up for the lost time.

So there ya go. If you don't hear from me again about this, our adventure has continued! But hopefully it's the type of adventure we signed up for rather this other sort. Still, I'm having fun, getting to know a lot of cool new friends, and learning a lot about being flexible. It's interesting: when you have no plans or expectations, it's a lot easier to not get disappointed or frustrated about setbacks like this!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

The List

So, while I'm on my Out West trip, I won't be posting much. But I don't want to leave you all with nothing to read, so... Look for my List, in installments, over the next week. You know, the List. Of qualities I'd ideally like to find in a future mate. C'mon, you know you have/had one too... I actually had a list many years ago, in college, but didn't have much need for it there for awhile. More recently, however, I've created a new list, which, incidentally, I believe is much more complete this time around. That is largely due to the fact that my past experience has shed a lot of light on the things that are important to me. At any rate, it should be an interesting read and may give you some insight into what makes me tick as well. But also, if you happen to know of anyone who seems to fit the bill, please let me know!

Friday, June 13, 2008

Wild, Wild West

This evening I'll be leaving for a ten-day trip out west with about 30 international students and scholars from UC and OSU. It'll be a tiring whirlwind of a tour, but I'm so excited because I've never been to any of the places we'll be visiting: Chicago, Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone, Grand Tetons, Jackson Hole, Las Vegas, Grand Canyon, Great Sand Dunes, and St. Louis. Even if we don't have a lot of time in any one place, I'll at least get some amazing photos and a feel for where I'd like to spend more time in the future. Plus, it'll be a great chance to get to know some new friends!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

It's All In the Name

I found this little news story interesting, so perhaps you will as well...

Chinese babies named 'Olympic Games'
(June 11, 2008, BBC News)
More than 4,000 children in China have been given the name Aoyun, meaning Olympic Games, in the past 15 years. The rise in popularity of the name is seen as a sign of support for the Games being staged in August in Beijing. Officials in charge of identity cards say that more than 92% of the 4,104 registered Aoyuns are boys. It is not uncommon for Chinese children to be given names of common events and popular slogans - such as Defend China, Build the Nation and Space Travel. There are 290,798 registered Civilisations. The first surge in Aoyuns came in 1992, when China applied to host to the 2000 Games. About 680 Aoyuns were registered at the time. In 2002 another 553 Aoyuns were named, after China was chosen to host the 2008 Games. The BBC's Chinese service says that in recent weeks babies have also been given names such as Hope for Sichuan, to show solidarity with earthquake victims.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Designed For What?

One of my teammates the first summer I went to China asked us a simple question that has stuck with me ever since: Have you ever felt like you were doing exactly what God designed you to do? At the time, I answered, "Yes, right now," and that's why I went back. There were some challenges and struggles living in China, to be sure, yet if circumstances had been different, I'd probably still be there. In fact, I pretty much think about it daily. So why don't I go? Well, mostly it's a financial thing. Not so much about support-raising, but about the sad state of my IRA. There are other fears that deter me, too: traveling alone, never meeting anyone I might want to date/marry, gaining weight again... Still, I can't shake this feeling that I'm supposed to be there. Is that a God thing, a "calling" perhaps? I wish I knew...

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

The Results Are In!

My overall time was 3:08:41, so I didn't quite make my 3:00:00 goal, but I wasn't too far off! And apparently I was actually 3rd out of 6 women in my age group, and 125th out of 158 people total in the Oympic distance triathlon. Just for comparison, last time I was 7th out of 7 in my division and 92nd out of 98 total. So... better!

My swim (1500m) took 32:21, which was 130th overall.
My first transition was 2:30.
My bike (40km) took 1:20:32, which was 119th overall. My average speed was 18.5 mph.
My second transition was 2:16.
My run (10km) took 1:11:02, which was 124th overall. I averaged 11:27 min./mi.

I'm satisfied with my swim. Last time, the swim was my best part: I was 52nd/98 while I was in the 90s for my bike and run. This time, the swim was the worst part. Weird. But since the only real difference was the wetsuit, I guess I learned that it helps immensely. O.k., well, good to know!

I'm very pleased with my bike. My goal for that part was 1:20, so, right on target. I also averaged 2.7 mph faster than last time. Not bad! Guess my time trials and training paid off.

I'm disappointed with my run. Granted, I was still two minutes faster than last year, even in the heat, but I was hoping to finish that leg in one hour. Still, I realize that the heat was a major determining factor in my run pace, and I'm o.k. with that. I did what I could; what more could I ask for? Plus, now I still have room for improvement for the next time!

So, there ya go!

Monday, June 9, 2008

Deer Creek Triathlon

O.k., here's the story of my race. Warning: it's long. Only embark upon this journey if you're really interested in all the details...

I got up at 4:00 a.m. so that I could shower and pack everything up to meet my friends Honeylyn and Loy at 5:30. From there, we had about an hour-and-a-half drive to the race at Deer Creek State Park. Along the way, we passed many other cars with bikes attached, and at that obscene hour it was fairly safe to assume that they were also headed to the race. Already the sense of camaraderie began…

As we were sampling several free muffins from my first trip to Mimi’s Café for dinner the night before, we suddenly noticed a car with a bike heading the opposite direction. "Hey, he's going the wrong way," I thought. Momentarily confused, we then noticed mile marker 87, though we were supposed to have gotten off at Exit 84. Oops! I guess WE were the ones going the wrong way... So we found a turn-around and were soon back on track. Glitch number one of the day, but not a major problem.

We arrived at the park about 7:00, just as we’d planned. However, we soon discovered that the line to pick up race packets was very long and moving at a snail’s pace! We utilized the time in line, however, to take turns using the restrooms and to check the temperature of the lake water. I decided not to wear my wetsuit since I was already sweating just standing out there and since the water felt comfortably cool at 72 degrees. By 7:30, the line was longer than when we’d arrived and we realized that there was no way the race was going to start on time. Comforting on the one hand, because we’d have more time to get everything ready, but that also meant we’d be finishing later when it was even hotter… Glitch number two, but what could we do?

After we got our packets and timing chips, we went back to the car to collect our things. But, as I was pumping up my tires, I encountered my third glitch of the morning: a busted tube. (Funny, all week long I’d been saying that I hoped I didn’t get my first flat ever during the race; I figured I was about due, though, since I had put almost 1000 miles on the tires since I got the bike in August.) Fortunately, I had a spare tube, so Loy helped me change it. But… the tire itself was really stretched out apparently, because it kept coming off the rim as we pumped it up. So I had to go to the guys at the Wheelie Fun tent to get a new tire. Still, lucky all this happened before the race!

So then I ran over to the transition area to set up. There was no more room on my assigned rack, so I shifted a couple bikes a little to make room on the next rack over and hurriedly laid out all my gear. Meanwhile, everyone else had already gathered down at the lake for the start of the race. "This is the worst feeling ever!" I thought, to be so rushed. After one last pit stop I ran down to the lake to join my competitors. Fortunately, the sprint distance racers were starting first, in waves, so I really did have plenty of time. While I put on my cap and goggles, I met a few women from Columbus who were doing their first triathlon that day. But, since they weren’t in my age group, we could all be friends. :-)

Finally, it was time for the Olympic-distance women to begin. We lined up at the water’s edge and waited for the horn to blow. (That was a little different: last September we started out in the water, but this time we were still on shore to begin. The water last fall was also very low, so there was a nice beach, and really you could probably have stood up at any point if you needed to. This time, however, after all the rain we’d had in the preceding weeks, there was no beach, and as we ran through the mud into the lake, we could still feel the grass beneath our feet well out into the water. Weird…) As I began swimming, I felt so refreshed in the cool water, even though I was still getting kicked and grabbed. When I looked up a little later, I remember thinking that that first yellow buoy was still really far away! “And I have to do TWO laps?!? What was I thinking?” I thought to myself. People seemed to be passing me a lot more than last year, too, and I thought for a moment that perhaps I should have worn my wetsuit after all… But as I rounded the first corner, I had more room and got into a better rhythm of breathing, and just started to enjoy the swim. As I completed the first lap, I was shouting “Halfway!” to myself in my head. I finished the second lap with no problems and actually ran up the hill to the transition area (unlike last year), feeling pretty good about my start, though I had no idea how long the swim actually took.

My transition was much quicker, too, I could tell, in part because I didn’t have a wetsuit to shed, but also because this all felt somewhat familiar and therefore more comfortable than last time. So after I put on my socks, shoes, gloves, watch, and helmet, and grabbed my bottle of Hammer Gel, I slid my bike off the rack and ran out of transition. I mounted, clipped in, and was off! After pedaling hard for two miles, I was surprised to look down and see I’d only gone two miles! And I kept looking for that first turn to get out of the headwind… But I was passing a few people, so I felt pretty good about my speed, and the wind felt terrific! I actually wasn’t even hot at all. After the first turn finally came, I wondered why I’d looked forward to that since the second road was much rougher. Oh, yeah, I remembered that. Too bad I wasn’t riding a Roubaix like Loy! O.k., time for some gel. Mmm, raspberry… Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate! Excellent. A couple more turns on the flat country roads, and then I came to the first of two small hills (which felt a lot bigger than they really were after racing along for ten miles!). I cruised downhill at 35 mph, and pushed up the other side, standing briefly. Then it flattened out and I quickly caught my breath before coming to the last little hill, just before completing the first lap. I looked up along the levee to see if I could happen to see Honeylyn and Loy on their run, but no such luck. “Halfway!” I again shouted in my mind as I came to the park entrance. The volunteer standing there said, “Sprint to the right, Olympic straight ahead.” I asked her to confirm, since last year we had to ride into the park, past transition, and back out again before beginning the second lap, but she said, “Yes, straight ahead,” so I kept right on riding! I checked my computer at that point and saw that I’d averaged 18.9 mph on the first lap. Awesome! And time-wise I was right on track to meet my three-hour goal as well. Second lap, same as the first. A few more swigs of gel and some water to wash it down just before finishing up the bike leg. Good stuff.

Back in transition, I racked my bike, tore off my helmet and gloves, changed shoes, threw on my hat, sunglasses, race number belt and nutrition belt, and was off! Suddenly, I felt the heat. I was tired. Immediately. I wanted to walk. Already. But I jogged along, hoping that I would pick up my pace as I continued, like I had in my training runs. Mile 1. Wow, it’s hot! Oh, man, and why’d we pick this course? I hate this stupid, grassy levee! O.k., onto the dam, much better. Water? Yes, please! I have my own, but only two 8-oz. bottles. I have a feeling I'm going to need more than that today… Mile 2. Keep going. What, NO shade? Not even a single, solitary tree? Wow… so… hot… Left turn down toward the boat ramp. Um, yeah, I’m definitely not maintaining the 10 min/mi. pace I need to finish in time. But I’m doing everything I can... Seriously, could it BE any hotter today?!? There’s the turnaround! “Halfway!” I need to walk. O.k., that’s enough. Go! (Then I started singing to myself.) “Just keep runnin’, just keep runnin’, just keep runnin’, runnin’, runnin’…” (Like the Finding Nemo “Just keep swimmin’” song.) Mile 4. Two… more… miles… So hot… Hmm, how should I narrate this race for my blog? Narrative? Thought processes? Will I write about thinking about what to write about? Will I write that? And that? O.k., enough. “Just keep runnin’, just keep runnin’, just keep…” Mile 5. Wow, I’m slow today. And I was so sure I’d shave the most time off my run… So hot… But look: there are still people just starting their run, so maybe I’m not doing SO bad… Or maybe everyone’s just really slow ‘cause it’s stupid hot out here... WHY are we doing this again? Oh, that’s right, it’s not supposed to be easy or everyone would do it. The dam, yea! The grassy levee... stupid levee… But that means I’m almost done! “Just keep runnin’, just keep runnin’…” Back into the park. Mile 6! Past the photographer guy. Past an ambulance and several people holding up a towel or something to create some shade for some poor, dehydrated, overheated runner. "God, be with that person. God... That's all I've got, just be with them..." I can hear the announcer at the finish line! I can SEE the finish line! Right then, that’s when I was finally able to pick up my pace to more than a slow jog. I sort of sprinted to the finish line, and there were Honeylyn and Loy cheering me on! Awesome, I made it!

A guy took off my timing chip. A lady told me I was second in my division. Seriously? I almost laughed. Oh, but then again, there might only be 2 ladies in my age group… Still, they put a medal around my neck. Honeylyn and Loy congratulated me. Someone else gave me water. Then I stood there and filled up my cup two more times. So thirsty… So hot… Honeylyn and Loy took my hat, sunglasses, belts, medal, etc. and I went back down to the lake for another quick dip to cool off. Back up the hill. Collect all my gear. Do I have to eat? ‘Cause I’m not really hungry, just thirsty. Nope, let’s just get going. Ah, air conditioning…

On the way home, we all talked about the race. Honeylyn and Loy did NOT care for the swim. They waited for each other at the transitions, though, and ran together. How sweet! Then we talked about the next one. Are we really gluttons for punishment? Perhaps. But it was so much fun! Except that stupid-hot run… (It’s kind of like when I used to go backpacking a lot: we’d get rained on, our feet would hurt from hiking, our backs would be sore from sleeping on the ground, we’d be dirty, and tired and, let’s be honest, a little grumpy. But as soon as we got back to the car, or maybe back home and showered up, all I could think was, “When can we go back?!?” It’s the same thing.) We also talked about trying a relay in the September Toyota Challenge tri. I’d swim, Loy would bike, and Honeylyn would run. Maybe we’d do the half-ironman distance, too, then, since we’d each only be doing one leg. Awesome…

I also called my apartment community office on the way home, to remind them not to give away the last room at the inn. It was mine! Since my air conditioner still wasn’t working, I told them they’d better give me a room there because the 90-degree apartment just wasn’t cutting it for me. After all, I had to get a few hours of sleep in before my two soccer games that night! Yeah, o.k., I guess I’m a little crazy…

(Just for the record, I wasn’t planning to play much at the games, but just to sub briefly if others were really tired. But when I arrived… One, two, three, I counted. Three? “No way!” I said, shaking my head. "I am NOT going to run around for two more hours!" We had to borrow players from other teams, and I ended up playing most of the first game. But I also got to score! Granted, the ball bounced off my leg into the goal, but still! Right time, right place. It was sweet. I played a good portion of the second game, too, but I was pretty much useless by then. Not to mention the fact that I messed up my toe somehow. I’m just really glad that that happened AFTER my race because I don’t think I’ll be running until the swelling and bruising go down!)

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Second Place?

So I just got back from my first triathlon of the year. I've only done one before, last September, and was pleased to just finish then, but this time I actually set a time goal for myself: three hours. That would be 13 minutes faster than my last race, though the swim this time was longer, so I was actually hoping to shave about 25 minutes off my previous time. Well, I don't think I quite made it; I didn't hear my time when I crossed the finish line, but my friends thought they said 3:04 or so. Not bad. But the surprising thing, and the thing that makes me not care SO much about the time (besides the fact that it was just stupid hot today), is that they said I was second place in my division! Granted, there may have only been two or three women in my age group, but I still got a medal!

Anyway, I'll post more later about the crazy events of the day, and once I know my overall time and splits and rankings and things, but for now I'm going to take a nice long nap in my room at the inn (since my AC still doesn't work) so that I can be ready for our two soccer games tonight!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Race Day Checklist

General
__ directions/map to race
__ course/transition map
__ photo ID
__ USAT membership card
__ money
__ sunscreen
__ sunglasses
__ towel for transition
__ camera
__ post-race clothes and shoes
__ pre- and post-race nutrition

Swim
__ tri shorts
__ tri top
__ wetsuit
__ Pam
__ swim cap(s)
__ goggles

Bike
__ bike
__ helmet
__ bike shoes
__ socks
__ Body Glide
__ gloves
__ watch/heart rate monitor
__ pump(s)
__ spare tube(s)
__ tools
__ water bottle(s)
__ gel and/or other nutrition

Run
__ running shoes
__ hat
__ race number belt
__ nutrition belt

Friday, June 6, 2008

Grumpy

So I kinda feel like I'm in China again today, because I've got clothes lying out all over my apartment to dry. Only in China that was common and expected because they don't really have dryers, but here I'm just peeved because I wasted $2.50. (That's 2 dryers; the first one wouldn't even start after I put the quarters in.) I've had this happen before and it wasn't really a big deal, but this time I was already in a bad mood because my AC hasn't been fixed yet even though I called about it a week ago, and it's in the 90s. In fact, we're supposed to approach or maybe even break some records this weekend, which is terrible timing since I have my first triathlon of the year on Sunday. You know, it's a lot harder to run and bike in 95-degree weather than in 80-degree weather, which I discovered today. So my plan is to go into the office of my apartment complex tomorrow and demand they fix the AC or else give me a room in the inn on the premises, or just give me back my rent money for the month. 'Cause this is ridiculous.

O.k., enough complaining... But boy, I sure am missing my Harbin winters right about now!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Pronoun Problems

Perhaps you've noticed a problem with my pronoun usage, specifically that I appear to use singular and plural first person pronouns interchangeably. You'd be correct. See, I still get confused about which to use when referring to the time in the past when I was part of a "we" unit, most notably when I'm talking about my China days. See, I wasn't in China, we were. But now there is no "we," so what's a girl to do? Anyway, I apologize for the confusion, but I still haven't figured out how to resolve this one... Oh yeah, and I also tend to just refer to him as "him," without a proper antecedent. Sorry, grammarians! But I promise it'll be o.k. :-)

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Television (Warning: Random Thoughts...)

So I've been feeling like I'm back in China recently.

Let me explain: See, we couldn't watch T.V. in China, or rather we could, but we just couldn't understand anything so we didn't bother. Instead, we watched a lot of Friends, CSI and Alias on DVD. Can't tell you how many times I've see each episode of Friends... Anyway, a couple months ago I fasted from T.V. for a month, which was fine, easy even. So much so that I'm not even sure when the fast ended because I never really started to watch it again. So then I figured, why pay for even the cheap-o $10 cable when I'm not using it? So I cancelled my service. Now, I get nothing. Not even your basic, local channels... nothing. You'd think that'd be great, that I'd get so much more done because I don't have that distraction anymore. And yet, it seems I'm more distracted now because of the vastness of this beast we call the internet. Before, I'd go to bed at about 11:30 because there was nothing else good on, (since I only had your basic, local channels,) but now I'm usually online till midnight, or 1:00, or 2:00... It's bad. And yet, not even as relaxing as just sitting back to watch a show on T.V.

So then last night, I got back from a really good workout, exhausted, and I really just wanted to watch an hour of T.V. before hitting the sack. But alas, I couldn't. Then I remembered that you can now watch T.V. online! Excited at the possibility, I opened up my web browser and started looking around for an episode of CSI. But I guess I'm not very tech-savvy, 'cause I couldn't for the life of me figure out how to go about finding a show to watch. Sure, I googled something like "watch TV online free" and found lots of websites offering something - news or sports channels, short clips from shows, etc. - but not what I was looking for. The only place I actually found where I could maybe watch an episode, tv-video.net, wouldn't actually play it. Don't know what's up with that...

Anyway, all this to say that I almost broke out the Friends DVDs again. I put in a movie instead, (which I promptly fell asleep in front of,) but I'm not sure how much longer I can hold out...

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Not Without Risks

I got an email today through the Cincinnati Cycle Club ride line about a biking accident that happened recently in Mexico. Apparently, a drunk driver fell asleep at the wheel and ran into a line of racers. One cyclist died and ten more were injured.

We try to be smart when riding on roads - wearing bright clothes, obeying traffic laws, etc. - but there are still risks involved. Sobering...

Monday, June 2, 2008

Changes

Now, I'm pretty sure that my psychologist friends will disagree, but I think personalities can change quite dramatically over time or as the result of significant events or changes in a person's life. I say this because I think it's happened to me at several points.

When I first took the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (or some free knock-off available online) during my freshman year in college, I was an ENFP, which seemed accurate. But I changed quite a bit that year, and when I took the test again a few years later, I was an ISTJ, exactly the opposite. Again, it seemed accurate, though. Why the change? Well, I'll just look at one example:

When I was part of a "we," I was much more introverted, preferring to keep close to home and not interested in meeting new people. I'm sure part of that was because I was simply content spending most of my time with him, but I also think it had a lot to do with the fact that he was an extreme introvert, which I believe "rubbed off" on me a bit.

Even now that I'm just me again, I've continued to say things like, "I don't like big groups," or "I'm not good at meeting new people." But I'm realizing that that is no longer true. I love meeting new people! In fact, I've recently been getting to know quite a few cool new folks from Kenwood Baptist through my awesome friend Christy, and from Four Corners through playing soccer with Lance and those guys, and most recently friends of a friend (Grace) of a friend (Kristen)... (And, incidentally, when I took the Myers-Briggs again just now, it says I'm an E again, though the rest is the same. Hmm...)

Anyway, I'm so grateful to have all of you as friends! Thanks for being part of my adventure. :-)

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Positron Omega!

This is my favorite new game. Why? Several reasons: it requires few materials, so you can play it anywhere; it's different every time you play, so it never gets old; it utilizes different skills, so there's something for everyone; and it's just plain fun! But I'm warning you: it's addictive! (Fortunately, you need at least six people I'd say, so you can't get too carried away...) Anyway, check out the rules below, give it a try, and let me know what you think! If you like it, feel free to join our Facebook group, "Fans of Positron Omega."

A. PREPARATION
Each player is given 3-4 pieces of paper (depending on how long they want the game to last). Players must then write down one noun (proper or improper person, place, or thing) on each paper then place it in a box/hat. Next, players are divided into 2-3 equal teams and each team moves to sit together.

B. GAMEPLAY
The game is divided into four rounds. In each round, teams alternate one-minute turns until all of the papers in the box/hat have been guessed. During each one-minute turn, players pick papers out of the box/hat and try to get teammates to guess the word according to the rules for that round. When a word is guessed correctly, the paper is placed in the team's pile and the box is passed to the next player on the team. The box/hat rotates through the team continuously until the minute is up. Unguessed papers are placed back in the box/hat and it is then passed to the next team for their one-minute turn. Turns in each round alternate between teams until all of the papers in the box/hat are gone.

C. ROUNDS
  1. Taboo - Players must get their teammates to guess the word through a verbal description. Gestures, spelling, sounds-like, or any form/variation of the word may not be used in this round.
  2. One Word- Players must get their teammates to guess the word through a single one-word clue. The first word that the player says after unfolding the paper is the chosen word ... so if the player says "um" or "well" first, that is the chosen word. The chosen word may be repeated indefinitely with different voices and intonations, but gestures may not be used in this round.
  3. Pictionary - Players must get their teammates to guess the word by drawing clues. Gestures, sounds, letters, numbers, and symbols may not be used in this round.
  4. Charades- Players must get their teammates to guess the word by acting out silent clues. Words, sounds, or drawings may not be used in this round ... but cameras are encouraged.
D. SCORING
At the end of each round, the papers in each team's pile are counted and the score for each team is recorded. The papers are then put back into the hat/box for the next round. The team with the most points at the conclusion of the fourth round is the winning team. A predetermined penalty (e.g. pushups, charlie horses) may then be given to the losing team.

If teams are tied at the end of the fourth round, a fifth tie-breaker round may be utilized to determine the winning team. This round, called Telepathy, requires that players guess the words on the papers without clues of any kind, basically shouting out the words they remember from previous rounds until the correct one is identified. Crazy, to be sure, but hilarious!

Saturday, May 31, 2008

T -1yr and Counting

So, my brother (Jeremy) is getting married exactly 1 year from yesterday. He called last night to ask me to be in the wedding - how exciting! It will be my honor to stand with him and Jean as they embark on this adventure together. And how cool that the wedding will be in Yosemite N.P.! Beautiful, simply beautiful (or so it appears from the photos I've seen). Check out their website for more info if you're interested...

Friday, May 30, 2008

That Which Costs Me Nothing

I must confess that I've been rather distracted recently. Maybe it's my new, fun, single friends; maybe it's the longer, warmer summer days; maybe it's the fact that my accountability partner was MIA for awhile... But for whatever reason, my God-time has definitely been lacking of late. So, in an attempt to get back on track, I pulled out an old book this week, a classic I read in college called Lady in Waiting. The first chapter, Lady of Reckless Abandonment, talks about finding fulfillment in God alone and using your time of singleness to really develop that relationship. Good stuff.

But the one thing that really stood out to me was a particular verse, 2 Samuel 24:24. Before this, David is told to build an altar to the Lord on Araunah's threshing floor. When he tries to buy the threshing floor, however, Araunah offers to simply give it to him instead, along with oxen for the burnt offering, tools, etc. "But the king [David] replied to Araunah, 'No, I insist on paying you for it. I will not sacrifice to the Lord my God burnt offerings that cost me nothing.' So David bought the threshing floor and the oxen..." This passage reminds me of the story of the poor widow giving everything she had in the temple (Luke 21:1-4). Jesus praised her, saying, "this poor widow has put in more than all the others. All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on."

Convicting. Not so much about money, but about time. When I offer up to Jesus the last few minutes of my day, when there's nothing to watch on T.V. and no more websites to distract myself with, when I'm already half asleep... that costs me nothing. And it's worth nothing. If He is my top priority, as I say that He is, it's high time I start making decisions that reflect that.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

People or Places

I've always enjoyed photography, but recently I've noticed that my preferred subject matter has changed. I used to take primarily landscape photos, waiting patiently until people moved out of the frame so I could capture the natural beauty of a scenic place. When I showed my pictures to students and friends in China, however, they would invariably complain about the fact that I wasn't in any of the photos. My logic? I already know what I look like, so why do I need photos of me? (That, and I was usually the one taking the pictures.) When I looked through their photos, I thought it was a little strange that they had to pose in the foreground of every shot.

But lately, I've realized that all my landscape photos sort of look alike, especially when I travel to the same places over and over. I mean, how many pictures of mountains and trees and streams in the Smokies do I need? The people, though, make each trip different and special, and those are the photos I'm probably going to look back through with warm memories. (Although I do still need to get better about taking pictures of more everyday activities rather than only when I'm on some special trip.) Anyway, just thought I'd take this opportunity to share with you a few pictures of some of the cool people I've had the pleasure of adventuring with over the last year... Enjoy!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Stupid Materialism

Every year in early November, my mom starts asking for Christmas ideas. My brother struggles to think of anything he needs or wants, which is sometimes frustrating when trying to buy for him, but I never have any problem coming up with a long list of things I'd like to have. That's even more frustrating, though, because I never seem to be satisfied. And I hate it. I know that possessions are worthless, so why do I always seem to want more? Why do I envy friends with nicer homes, or furniture, or gadgets, or... whatever?

Compared to the general population, I'm quite good with my money: I've never NOT paid a credit card bill in its entirety, for example, and I do acually have a retirement account which is growing, if ever so slowly. But that's not really a good measure since the general population is just foolish when it comes to finances. I want to be a better saver, I want to be able to give more to the Great Commission... I want to not want more all the time.

Then along comes this silly Economic Stimulus check. What's up with that? I admit that I don't really understand the logic behind this plan, but maybe that's because I'm not planning to go buy a new HDTV just because the government throws a few hundred dollars my way. My IRA could use that money; my car insurance is due pretty soon; I have a bit of tithing to catch up on... Oh, I'll definitely use the money, don't get me wrong, but probably not in the way the powers-that-be are hoping. Sorry! (O.k., not really.) Still, I do have to admit that every now and then a pesky little thought emerges from the back of my mind: "Ooh, free money!" it says. "Think of all the cool stuff you could buy with that: clothes, a new cell phone, aerobars for your bike..." Stupid materialism.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Just One of the Guys

O.k., time for me to bare my soul.

When I first went to China in the summer of 2000 to teach at an English camp for middle-schoolers, one of their assignments at the end of our six weeks together was to write an essay about their American teacher. Here are a few excerpts from my students' essays:
  • "Jenn is tall and strong. She can remove a big desk and turn it over by herself. I'm sure if you see this you will be so surprised." Louisa
  • "She is a active person. Sometimes she likes a girl. The smile always on her face. She also make us very happy. We studies with her feel happily. But sometimes I think she likes a boy. Because her very strong and tall." Angel
  • "She's hair is golden, though it is not really. I think it's very beautiful. Because the girls always like making themselves more beautiful. She's eyes are blue. I like her eyes, too. Jenn is very tall, also very strong. Jack said if Jenn was angry, nobody could fight with she. It's only a joke, don't be angry with me, please." Gary
  • "Jenn is very tall and strong, like a man, but she is very beautiful and always there is a smile on her face. . . . I think Jenn is good at P.E. and very strong. She is very brisk." Connie
  • "She was very tall and strong. I think she was good at sport, maybe American football." Sophia

Obviously, there is a theme here...

At the time, I didn't mind these comments. And yet, more recently, I've become very sensitive and self-conscious about this because I've been criticized for being too strong and not feminine enough. So, as a result, I now avoid strength training of any kind in favor of cardio, I won't wear t-shirts out in public, I always put on a little make-up before going out, and I'm growing out my hair. Why? Honestly? To try to fit the image of what I think guys want in a girl. In reality, I know that this past experience relates to a solitary guy whose opinion is likely not universal, and yet these wounds run deep; even though I hate that I give them such power in my present life, they still influence so many of my decisions.

For many reasons, I feel like I'm often seen as "just one of the guys." In some ways, I love this: I love that I can keep up with the boys playing sports or climbing things or taking crazy dares... But on the other hand, it scares me to think that perhaps, because I'm "just one of the guys," I'm somehow not dateable. I want my future husband to be my best friend, and it's very important to me to be able to play together since quality time is my primary love language.

In certain regards, yes, I am more like one of the guys: I'm not that emotional and I rarely cry; I don't take offense easily and can pretty much handle whatever you have to tell me; and I prefer to bond while doing something together rather than just talking. But there are many things about guys I still just don't get, like why they fart so much, or why they all seem to want motorcycles, or why they think violence is fun.

Even though I may seem strong and independent, I still feel weak a lot of the time, and I long for a man who will protect me. And I want to be the soft, gentle, encouraging, nurturing woman who makes my man feel that much stronger. I guess what I'm saying is that I am complex, and I hope and pray that I will be understood and cherished for my many unique characteristics rather than made to feel ashamed of who God made me. That's all.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Written Language in the Digital Age

Emails, blogs, IMs, text messages... These new forms of communication have become the standard in our digital age and are undoubtedly more convenient than their precursors in many ways. And yet I can't help feeling like we're losing the art of written language as we become more reliant on these modern technologies. Maybe I'm too traditional, but I still prefer to read things with "proper" grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc., and I must admit that I judge people based on their writing skills. Poor grammar is the most offensive, followed by misspelling, and lastly punctuation (or lack thereof). If, however, you take the time to do these things well, I will respect you that much more. I should also confess that I always proofread even the most casual emails I send, and still feel rather uncomfortable IMing without capitalizing or punctuating. (Is that a word?) But don't get me wrong: I'm still a linguist rather than a grammarian. So go ahead and end a sentence with a preposition!

(And now I'm reading and rereading this post, wondering what errors people are going to point out... That's fine, feel free.)

Thursday, May 22, 2008

No News Is... Maybe Not Good

I've never really been interested in the news. But I'm beginning to feel rather ashamed of my apathy and ignorance.

When I was in China in 2004, a student asked me what I thought of Kerry. I had to ask him to repeat his question, not because I didn't understand the words he spoke but because I had no background information to connnect his words to in my mind. And that is how I learned who was running against Bush in the presidential election. (Don't worry, I didn't vote. Although that is perhaps disconcerting in and of itself and might become the topic of a future post...)

In China, I had the excuse of being far from home where it was difficult to access information about current events. It was also decidedly convenient NOT to have an opinion at times in order to avoid debates about sensitive subjects. But really, I just didn't care. Since I've been back in the States, I still haven't made it a priority to keep up-to-date on the goings-on of the world, or even my own country or city. I don't get the newspaper, I don't have cable or even an antenna to watch local channels on TV, and I don't visit news sites online. In fact, the only news source I currently follow is a handy email sent to me weekly from ZGBriefs, which highlights news stories from China. Yet I remain completely ignorant of the myriad newsworthy events occuring daily in the U.S. and throughout the rest of the world.

Why? Well, it's hard for me to care about things that don't affect me directly. But I'm beginning to think that perhaps my perception of "what affects me" is a little skewed. I mean, it's easy to see how knowing the weather forecast is useful, but maybe, just maybe, politics and wars and international relations and economic trends affect me more than I realize. So how do I cure this apathy?