I Was There

Irmgard, the 73-year-old German lady I'm staying with in Princeton, always greets me in the morning or when I come home with ads, articles, events, etc. that she thinks I might or should be interested in. Well, the headline she showed me this morning was: "Triathlete feared drowned." Apparently, a 52-year-old local man never came out of the water after the swim leg of his race yesterday. Rescue workers searched the lake in the afternoon, but thunderstorms impeded their efforts, so they're supposed to be resuming their search this morning.

Here's the full article I saw this morning. And here's a shorter blurb, with pictures.

This just in...

And here's the follow-up article from Tuesday's paper.

The Champion of Whatever

Chinese fortune cookies amuse me. I mean, besides the fact that they don't actually have fortune cookies in China, the "fortunes" often aren't really even. So I think I'll start sharing some of my favorites that I find. Today's:

"Go for the gold today! You'll be the champion of whatever."

Why?

Why do I like ETS and this job so much?
Why are my mentors so cool?
Why is Princeton so pretty?
Why is everything so close and convenient here?
Why do I enjoy the diversity so much?

Why haven’t I met many Christians here?
Why is the church not as warm and welcoming as CCC?
Why don’t I get to play guitar anymore?
Why is Princeton so expensive?
Why do all my co-workers feel stuck here?
Why are my friends and family so far away?

Why did I make up my mind before I came that I wouldn’t like it?
Why did I assume I wouldn’t stay even if I were offered a job?
And yet, why did I decide to wait to sign a new lease in Cincinnati?
Why do I feel like crying whenever I think about moving here?
And yet, why do I feel like it might be a really good opportunity?
Why do I choose what I want rather than what I think I should do?
And yet, why do I assume those two things are different?

Why can’t I have it all?

So basically what I’m saying is: I’d appreciate your prayers. :-)

Small and Weak

So I've been in Jersey two weeks now. I'm really enjoying the job, and I've met some nice people, but I'm still just really missing everyone back home. It's funny, 'cause I don't think I took my friends for granted while I was in Cincinnati - I knew they were great and I treasured time spent with them. But I still can't seem to fully engage with my new surroundings because my heart just isn't here. In fact, I think I'm afraid to really like it here because I don't want to leave Cincinnati for good.

But anyway, the point is... I've been trying hard to keep in touch with everyone in Cincinnati, and I so look forward to chats and emails with old friends. But I can't help but wonder why I don't treasure my God as much, why I don't look forward to time spent with him the same way I long to connect with those he's created and placed in my life. I do take him for granted, and I know it, but I still don't know what to do about it. I think the problem is that I'm small and weak. My mind can't possibly comprehend the depth of who God is or what he's actually rescued me from. He seems distant and impersonal, even though I know that he isn't. And I think that's what's most frustrating: the discrepancy between what I feel and what I know, between how I want my relationship with God to look and how it actually is.

Hmm. Guess I just wish I knew how to love and enjoy God more. Any thoughts on that one?

Stuck in the Middle

At work, I'm old. Other times, not so much.

See, the other three interns in my office are 19, 20 and 21. Two of them can't (legally) drink or gamble, none of them can rent a car, they're all still in school. Sometimes it's funny, like when I'm talking about a musical I was in in high school, 15 years ago, and the other girl says, "Fifteen years ago, I was FOUR." In fact, we joke about the age difference almost every day, which is fine, but sometimes I do just feel a little out of place with them.

Then I come home, and hang out with 73-year old Irmgard. And the other guy who rents a room from her is probably in his 50's and always calls me "kiddo." Then on Monday I went up to the library for this "Noodle Talk" group thing, and it was basically me chatting it up with a bunch of 50- and 60-year-olds again. Interesting, but still, felt a little out of place.

So, yeah! Life's a little strange right now. But it's o.k.: keeps me on my toes!

Philadelphia Women's Triathlon Results

So I realize that these were "only" women competing, and that it was probably the first race for many of them, and that a lot of them probably weren't there to be really competitive, but I still think I did really well! Here are my times (keep in mind these were shorter distances than the last one I did):

My overall time was 1:39:06, which was 157th out of the 723 women who completed the triathlon. In my age group, I was 23rd out of 80.

My swim (700 yards) took 14:18, which was 206th overall.
My first transition was 2:54.
My bike (17.1 miles) took 49:54, which was 46th overall. Yea! I averaged 20.4 mph.
My second transition was 2:06.
My run (5km) took 29:55, which was 380th overall. I averaged 9:39 min/mi.

So there ya go! Good times... (I meant "fun" when I first typed that, but pretty good times for the race too!)

A Different Kind of Race

So, today I was in the Philadelphia Women's Triathlon. Now, I've done two of these before, but this one was different. First of all, there were almost 1000 competitors, where the other two had only two or three hundred. And there were more than 70 women in my age group today as compared to six or eight the last two times. Plus, this time the athletes were all women, which was cool. The other two races were both at a rural park, too, while this one was in the center of the city, so there were a lot more spectators today as well. But most notably, there was a huge sense of community or camaraderie this time. It all began with the pre-race meeting/pep rally event on Saturday. I met a couple of nice women there who were doing their first triathlon. I found them again on Sunday, too, so it was nice to kind of know a couple other people even though I signed up for the race alone. Anyway, after the race, most people hung out for awhile, too, and they even had an awards ceremony! All this was new to me, since the last two times, people pretty much took off as soon as they were finished. So, put all these things together, and you have a great race experience! I did well, too, though I'll post the details later, once they're online. And now I'm totally excited for my next race in two weeks, which might be even cooler since there will be 2500 triathletes there!

Out Of My Element

I feel like I've become quite the adventurer of late. I mean, that I would even pack up and move ten hours away by myself is in itself a bit surprising to me, but now I'm exploring even more. Like, for instance, I'm currently sitting in the living room of one of the other interns, in Philadelphia. I drove here this morning because there is no race-day packet pick-up for the triathlon tomorrow. Which is also pretty amazing: that I even signed up for this race not knowing anyone else doing it or even anyone else in the city. But God provided this girl, and it's totally cool 'cause I didn't have to pay for a hotel room like I thought I'd have to, and I even got to do a load of laundry this evening!

Anyway, I also feel a bit out of my element because most of the people I've met out here aren't Christian, or at least don't appear to be. It's interesting, because in Cincy, most of the people whose paths I crossed were. Even a lot of the jobs I had in Cincy seemed to be places where a lot of other believers worked, but not so much here apparently. It could be a great opportunity to share with them what's most important to me, but instead I just seem to be paralyzed, realizing that I'm ill-equipped for the task. But then again, that just might be the best place to be: weak so that He can be my strength.

Anyway, I'm still curious to find out what this summer is all about, what God wants to do in me and through me during my time here... So, yeah! Good times.

Feeling More at Home

You know, when I was in China, certain little connections to Cincinnati made me feel closer to home, like seeing a P&G product. Well, I got the same feeling yesterday when I was driving through the Princeton campus and spotted a very familiar-looking building. Immediately, I could tell that the Lewis Library was designed by Frank Gehry because it reminded me so much of the fluid form of the Molecular Studies building on U.C.'s east campus. Anyway, it made me smile. But I'm also just feeling better about everything because I'm getting into a routine with work, working out, checking email, etc. So, no worries. :-)

First Day at ETS

Work today was great. I'm sure part of that was just getting out of the house for the day and meeting some cool new people, but also I think I'm just really going to enjoy the actual work. Which I should probably explain a bit now that I know a little more: apparently we summer interns write hundreds or even thousands of questions that get put into a pool. Then throughout the year, the full-time, on-site teams polish them up, test them, put them together, etc., etc. But it all starts with us. I'll be working on the TOEIC test (Test of English for International Communication), writing items for the speaking and writing parts specifically. There are five of us on those test sections, plus another six writing the listening and reading parts of the TOEIC. And I'm not sure how many other interns there are working on the TOEFL questions, but I'm thinking maybe another 15 or so. Anyway, we all seem to be getting along, and there's even been talk of getting a game of kickball or ultimate frisbee together, so that should fun. However, I am feeling a bit old: most of the other interns are still in school, and one of the girls on my team is only 19! So I guess happy hour is out...

All in all, though, it'll be good I'm sure. They did also mention that there will be openings we could apply for if we find that we enjoy the work, which could be really cool. But I'm still very hesitant to even consider something like that at this point since I miss everyone and everything in Cincinnati so much! Guess I'll just have to wait and see how everything goes. Ah, another lesson in patience and trust...

First Impressions of Princeton

Irmgard (my new landlady/roommate):
sweet, sad, outgoing, helpful, lonely.

The house:
old, dark, a little dirty/cluttered, sufficient for the short-term.

The neighborhood:
very diverse, quiet, close to everything.

The Wagners (Lance's sister's family):
warm, welcoming... just plain awesome.

Being uncomfortable:
priceless.

Yeah, uncomfortable pretty much sums it up at this point. I know that's a good thing sometimes, though, and I'm trying to keep a positive attitude: it'll be a great chance to get some more reading and praying done without all the distractions I have in Cincy; I could use a lesson in living simply; and I think I can really be a blessing to Irmgard. But yeah, it might not be an easy summer, and I do appreciate your prayers...

Just Friends?

O.K., so let me just pose this question: Can guys and girls be just friends?

I think that it's possible but rare, because more often than not one of the people will end up wishing it were more. This brings me back to my old "time theory" as well: if you spend enough time with a person, you will probably end up liking them at some point. At least that's been my experience. Which makes sense, because if you like a person enough as a friend to want to spend so much time with them, it's only logical that it could develop into deeper feelings over time. Because the qualities you appreciate in a friend are generally the same qualities you would hope for in a mate. But, then again, maybe that's just me...

So yeah, I think that perhaps perusing your friends of the opposite sex is the most logical place to look for a potential mate. But that just gets tricky then, because if you're not looking for more than a good friendship, you really have to be very careful about how much time you're spending with these people and how much you share with them... Hmm.

Anyway, those are just my thoughts. What you do you think?

Virtual Intimacy

So I've got this new friend, Kim, who I've been chatting online with a bit lately. In fact, we've probably talked almost as much online as we have face to face since we've only met in person twice. Still, it's been cool getting to know her better through our online conversations, and I'm excited for her to come back to Cincinnati again so we can hang out some more.

What I find interesting about this whole scenario, though, is that it seems to be working, that we seem to be developing a real friendship through this virtual means. But why would that surprise me? Well, I think it's because I've been in similar situations where it was a lot more problematic. For example, I had one friend I talked to a lot on the phone, like for hours at a time, but then when we'd meet in person it just seemed weird, like suddenly the intimacy we'd developed on the phone was missing in person, if that makes sense. Then there was this other person I became "facebook friends" with after meeting once, and we IMed a lot over the course of several weeks. But again, when we met in person the next time, it was just awkward.

So this is one thing Kim and I were chatting about yesterday, this sort of "false intimacy" that seems to develop quite easily when getting to know someone through these modern modes of communication. She mentioned that there's sometimes a superficiality to such conversations, which I can definitely see, but my experience has more often been the opposite: I seem to be quite comfortable discussing topics online that I would never talk about in person with someone I only recently met. And I think this could get me into trouble, particularly when the person I'm chatting with is of the male variety. See, we have these really deep virtual conversations and I think that we're becoming really close, but then when we meet up in person, I realize that in reality we are acquaintances at best.

Problems have also arisen when I've tried to have a serious conversation online, even when it's with a good friend. For example, no matter how well I know a person, I think it's still much more likely for misunderstandings to occur when communicating online, because subtle messages or feelings often get lost without the aid of body language, facial expressions, or tone of voice. Apologies also seem to be particularly difficult because I never seem to know whether the issue has been resolved. Or if I bare my soul to someone online about an especially personal topic, the next time we get together I can't help but think, "Did we really have that conversation?" and the intimacy still seems to be less than what I would expect had we simply talked face to face.

Yeah. So, conclusions? Well, it seems to me that building friendships online may be fine, but it gets a lot trickier when it's a guy-girl thing. (But that gets into a whole nother discussion about whether or not guys and girls can be "just" friends...) Also, if it's a significant conversation of any sort, it's probably safest to just do it in person.